Life after a miscarriage: Stigma, Silence, and Support 

We always hear about the statistic of being 1 in 4 who suffer a loss from a miscarriage and yet there is little to no support for those experiencing this. Most miscarriages take place before 20 weeks and no matter how long you carried that baby for, a loss is a loss. After you heard the devastating news that you lost your baby, did the medical provider offer empathy, resources, or comfort? Did you have supportive family or friends, or did you keep this a secret? 

Often, we ask ourselves, why did this happen to me? What did I do wrong? What happens now? 

We hear insensitive comments like, ‘you can always try again,’ ‘at least you lost the baby early.’ ‘you have other children so be grateful.’ 

For some, this loss may be easier to grieve but for the majority, it’s a heart wrenching experience. It can mean losing a family member they had hopes, dreams and intensive love for. Some people have a whole support system while others are navigating pregnancy loss privately. 

There is no wrong way to feel but there are ways to help. Connecting with other who get what you are going through, caring for your body, and setting boundaries. 

So, let’s talk about feelings. After going through such trauma, you can experience the five stages of grief, denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. You could be feeling shocked and being disconnected physically and emotionally from reality. It may take a while to process these feelings and regain a sense of reality. 

If you are struggling with these feelings, thoughts, or lack of support, I am here to help you. We can discuss healthy coping skills, exploring grief and getting through the different stages, and most important being here to listen to you and being a support. Click “Schedule An Appointment” today to schedule a free 15 minute consultation.

Monica Bartley, SWT